25 Years

25 years ago, I was just a little infant who just came out of a womb. My mother gave me my very life; I took my first breath and cried, and that's when the journey had began. A journey of a life that lives in the world of wonder, so many adventures and obstacles.

From an infant to a little kid who was trying to take a first leap of faith; learn to walk. That was the hardest thing any one of us could ever encounter, yet that was the very beginning of everything in life. That meant a lot, not just physically, but both mentally and spiritually in value. Something so simple, learning to walk a first step, can mean so much and yet it is something that we could hardly remember, as no one does remember their very own first step but it is only to be told as witnessed. My parents were happy to witness my first step as a child; a first step towards life, a step onto the world, and a first step into life.

Indeed, that was the beginning of everything; from walking to running, then from running to sprinting, and from sprinting to jumping. Amazingly, human nature can take its own course of nature to progress gradually and naturally. Yet, we learn to read and see things for ourselves; able to reason and differentiate the good and bad for us as taught to be. But not all were that way, yet I was lucky and blessed to be raised in a good manner in good faith and dignity.

Growing up as a kid; I was playful, kept many options to myself in all things that I could try. I had never stopped exploring, and most of all I had never stopped having fun according to my father. And according to my mum, I had never stopped eating too because I love foods. So perhaps, that was a very wonderful childhood of mine as being happy and active were the way to live for me. Yet, at that age I couldn't see the future but just to live as I wanted to be.

I remember, when my father first took me to the swimming pool when I was only 7...and that's when it all started, the passion for swimming. It felt good to play in the water, I loved it and I just wanted to stay in the water for as long as I could. That's how it is in human nature, we just love to do things that make us feel good or satisfied. So then, I took up swimming lesson and it became a sport to be a swimmer. But I was never too serious in swimming because as a kid I was still having fun a lot and never stop trying and venturing into other sports. And, I never questioned myself why I should stay to one sport instead of keep trying others. My father used to question and lecture me a lot regarding that, as he wanted me to focus well in swimming. But I just couldn't keep that virtue, as the urge to try new things in life was so strong that I couldn't resist...so, I have never bothered to stop trying over and over and over again, till these very days!

People always say how one person can be such a daydreamer in life that they do not live in reality. Yet, to me dreaming is a key to a start of something new; something that would carry you forward, or a step ahead into a new era. Dream enables you to see things that others do not see, dream tells you tales that others do not know off, and dream shows you the nonexistence into the existence. Then again, many people are tended to be blinded by reality because of the fact that there is a need to survive in this world. Survive? Survive as simple as it is, is just a word to describe what a human has to do to live in this world; in terms of the environment and the community or society they are in. Yet, that defines how carried away we can be when we are attracted to what is more important then ourselves, our very own life.

Some people find lives through what they do, some find it through what they can do, and some find it through how they can do. Perhaps, most individuals have their very own definition of this in their very own life. While here I am, I have my own as I have lived to tell a tale of my very own journey. I was once a dreamer; always dream of being somebody some day, always dream of achieving something some day, and always dream of getting somewhere or something some day. And however, those dreams were no longer fictional dreams when they have already become a reality in my life as I am the living dream, doing what I want and achieving what I want, living it the best I can to be what I want and whatever it takes all that can to catch a dream of my own; and that's my life, the dreamer of a living dream.

Living a dream was just a dream comes true, it is a reality to live as everything starts with nothing and become something. Believe it or not, spaces exist among us all and yet we do not intend to see it. When dream comes true, life gets interesting and it also progresses to the next level. As we grow older, we start to realize the importance of love; love of a soul, caring, partnership, passion and romance. Then, we started to become a soul searcher at some age and got deeply madly in love for the first time.

Being in love for the first time would be an unforgettable adventure for most of us; sadly, some people do end their lives for their first adventure, however I had mine with fun. From falling in love to falling out of love, from joy to pain, and from smile to tears; as dramatic as it could be, love comes in all forms of life. Yet, love is only a feeling of affection that surrounds every one of us. I am truly grateful for the love I have from my family and friends, and of course for the ones that I love and that I adore in my heart is highly appreciated too. And somehow, I just realized how much love I have around me and I am just never short of love in this world, especially the love of God to mankind himself.

For now, being the 25 and I only get to be 25 once, while looking back the past 25 years I am truly grateful for who I am today. Life today is just so wonderful as there were from the past as well. Today, I asked my mother "Mum, how was it like 25 years ago when I was born?" and she would never hesitate to recall the story over and over again. Today is the 25th time she told, as it is a story to be told once a year; a story of my birth. I love my mother, her love has given me so much in the past till presence. And to her having the first child was something truly wonderful 25 years ago; and to look at me now, I'm all grown up from a little infant 25 years ago. I was once relying on her and my father to teach me how to walk, now that I am on my own feet it is just so independent that I'm set freely in this world to live my life.

I love my life, as I love who I am for what I have become. Life has been a dream comes true in me, and life has been wonderful in me. 25 years of adventure and I'm still going, never stop living the passion that I have and never stop being the me that I have always been. Most of all, I have not stopped achieving what I wanna do in my life. 25 is only a number, what ahead is a greater future and everything is just gonna get better and better. Life comes in challenges remember, but I'm only human enough to do this because obstacles never fail for success, and to succeed is to learn from failure, and to learn from failure is to never give up. All that takes is just a little faith; a little faith that carries you through time. Time tells it all, all there is in life.

25 years of Jack; and here I am living the me that I am. Thank you all for the birthday wishes, I am truly grateful and pleased with your heart of warmth. May you be blessed in life and do whatever you do for the best that can be in your life...God Bless!

by Jack Ho

The Disappointment of a Sponsorship

One month of life in Australia, it's been a great experience; and not to mention I have learn a lot this time. Competing at the ITU World Championship was not easy, as it's not some hanky-panky race that anyone can imagine. The Australian Uni Games was fun, totally something different than I expected. But after all, I had a great time along with all the challenges I overcame.

Besides, behind all these great times and achievements there has been the downside of it as well. And I never thought how terrible this is to me and others; it is a total disappointment. My trip was all funded by Curtin University of both Perth and Miri's campus, which I am grateful. But in the end, due to the delay of booking resulted under-budget as prices of flights and hotel increased closer to travel period. It was never expected that such a simple task can be delayed due to management's policy and procedures; likewise, it is said this is just another typical Malaysian culture.

So, by the time I was in Gold Coast for ITU World Champ the domestic flight tickets between Brisbane and Perth were still not being purchased. Initially I had already planned earlier to travel back to Perth for 2 weeks before Australian Uni Games, which the Uni Games was 2 weeks later after ITU World Championship. This was basically help to cut cost by not traveling back to Malaysia back and forth, as it would cost highly and timely too. So it was all included in the calculated and approved budget, and it was their responsibility to make all the necessary bookings and arrangements. Yet, the ticket to Perth was only purchased the day before the World Championship.

I was pretty stress out actually, I couldn't focus well in my race having to worry all the bookings were not done appropriately. I had to chase after emails and do all the follow-up by myself, and having to race at World Championship I needed to get my race arrangement done too. It was a totally hectic week the moment I arrived in Gold Coast, and I was not happy with the situation I had to encountered especially with the domestic flight issue.

And when they finally purchased the ticket to Perth, I felt a relief so I wouldn't have to get stuck in Gold Coast that weekend. But, they only purchased one way ticket and not both ways because they were short of RM$700. So verbally, they told me they would work it out next 2 weeks to get me back to Gold Coast for Uni Games. In the end, it turn out uglier than I expected.

The return ticket was costing at RM$2315, one way only, when both ways only cost RM$2400 and they didn't purchase it fully because there was a short of RM$700. And coincidently, the week before Australian Uni Games was Hari Raya which happen that most people were on leaves in Curtin Miri. So that meant nobody was gonna get me my flight; I got an email from one of them saying needed to wait till everybody is back to work by the following week after Hari Raya. I was so pissed, absolutely pissed, when I saw the email written that way because it was so clear before that the Australian Uni Games was the following week. Hence, I knew something fishy was wrong. Did they actually pay attention to my schedule written in the proposed budget and competition details? Were they trying to twist story and run away from the situation? Being irresponsible? But it got even more interesting as time went along.

So I typed and email to Curtin Perth's EAFU coordinator and Uni Games coordinator; I told them I had to make a decision that if Curtin Miri couldn't get me the flight back to Gold Coast I would have to forfeit from Uni Games and return to Miri from Perth by AirAsia. I personally did not have the money to afford the flight back to Brisbane, I only had the right amount to survive in Australia for a month. Then, I was called up to attend a meeting with the coordinators in Curtin Bentley which it got very interesting during the meeting.

Firstly, the coordinators were telling me there was no representation of Curtin at ITU World Championship because I was not wearing the cycling jersey given during the race and neither of Curtin appeared on my tri-suit, and the achievement I made was more likely a personal achievement; and the following they said since if I was gonna forfeit from the Uni Games, I have to refund the amount sponsored because out of 3 designated competitions (ITU World Champ, Ananconda Adventure Race, & Uni Games) I only competed one. So that statement really confused me at first; because they mentioned I did not represent Curtin at ITU World Champ and in the end said outta 3 competitions I only represented ONE (ITU World Championship) which I went speechless for a moment. The cycling jersey was clearly to be meant for the Uni Games because I was gonna compete in the Cycling event; which also to define "cycling" jersey is meant for "cycling" event, and not triathlon.

My thought was; how could I wear the cycling jersey at a triathlon world championship because ITU has a set of uniform rules. This is a triathlon world championship organised by International Triathlon Union (ITU), and they are very strict. Even on my tri-suit, very limited amount of spaces are given to allocate sponsor's representation and it's very costly to get the printings done which was not included in the budget. I was competing in my tri-suit from previous sponsorship, as Curtin only gave me a cycling jersey for the Uni Games, and I even wore that cycling jersey during the open ceremony.

So, what was the actual point of saying I did not represent Curtin at ITU World Championship? Just an excuse or reason to get the funded money back? You be the judge of that. Then, the coordinators suggested that I better get someone to help me out to get the flight ticket back to Brisbane and get Curtin Miri to reimburse upon return; which I could see no guaranteed.

So after the meeting, I typed an email back to Curtin Miri regarding the situation if I do not make it to Uni Games I had to refund the total amount funded back to Curtin Perth and yet there was no reply not until a week later when I was in Gold Coast where they mentioned Curtin Miri could not fund anymore and will only explain why when I return to Miri. So at the end, I had to request a help from a friend of mine to purchase a ticket back to Brisbane to get to Uni Games; which means I BORROWED money to do so, so I am in debt of RM$2315!!! I was shocked when I saw the email from Curtin Miri while I was in Gold Coast; my mood was just being ruined and had no motivation to race at all because having to be in debt is really a burden and pressure.

After the Uni Games, I came back to Miri and attended a meeting on Monday morning. And, I was even stunned by what were being mentioned; they did not see how competing in ITU World Championship is a representation for Curtin (same point mentioned as Curtin Perth), and did not know this race is included in the budget as Uni Games was the only designated race (Wow!!!). So I got even more confused and stunned this time by the fact that there has been a big twist and turn of story and also pretending. And, Curtin Miri could not reimburse the amount for the return flight ticket to Brisbane because there is no more budget and couldn't justify why I had to go to Perth. I was just too shocked, because during the previous meetings it was mentioned clearly that staying in Perth will help to cut cost and traveling time, which was being approved in the budget.

I am really disappointed with how things have turn out; before I traveled to Australia, the races were stated clearly in the budget and schedule details (ITU Triathlon World Championship and Australian Uni Games) which was being approved, and the coordinators even made numerous confirmations where it was all out in the press media too. Then now, I am being criticized at some point by using the issue where I did not wear the jersey during the race in ITU Triathlon World Championship. Even before I left for Australia, in numerous meetings these races were mentioned clearly that I was gonna compete and I even get well wishes from everyone. And now, how can they pretend that they do not know I was gonna compete at ITU World Championship? Again, everything was stated clearly in the budget and schedule before it got approved and if not I would have not received so much money to go to Australia.

It feels unfair and really disappointed, because I was not the only one who raced in ITU Triathlon World Championship from Curtin University. Andrew Tyack who was racing in the sprint category and did not wear the cycling jersey during the race as well, yet he wasn't being criticised. And furthermore, the Curtin newsletter was published today and where they congratulated Andrew for competing in ITU World Championships Sprint Category and Ananconda Adventure Race, while I did not get any words for competing in the ITU Triathlon World Championship Olympic Distance (742th overall over 2000 triathletes and Uni Games (18th Time Trial). Andrew and I are both funded by Curtin to compete at the 3 designated races; which are ITU Triathlon World Championship, Anaconda Adventure Race and Australian Uni Games. So both of us are equaled that we competed 2 out of 3; and yet, I was the one being criticized of competing at ITU Triathlon World Championship was a personal achievement and not a representation for Curtin. Then being left to be responsible for the cost of debt; just because they are out of budget and delayed all the bookings which put the troubles onto me by pushing the faults onto me as well. How irresponsible is that?

So now that I am in debt of RM$2315, which feels a burden to me and I gotta find a way to work this out as Curtin Miri wouldn't reimburse. After all these problems that I see of how they push problems and avoid the fact from one and another; it does tell me how unreliable this sponsorship is. I am totally disappointed, so as many. Should I continue to represent Curtin and still market the EAFU Program for them? I doubt it, as I am thinking twice because I do not wish other athletes to go through the same thing as I did. It is just terrible, as this has really distracted me from focusing from the races.

After all, who is it to blame? To many of you out there, you know who and I don't have to spill it out. This is my blog and I write whatever I want where this is a freedom to write and speak out my mind in my own writings, this is a disclaimer to all readers before someone tries to sue me over this.