Sacrifice

Somethings are just not meant to be told, but to be kept in the heart. I do feel very bad about it as I have certain things in my life that I just cannot tell Zaza about it. That is why I always have to tell white lies to her, and there's no way I can make her understand.

I do feel a little regret that I didn't tell her all the truth and what's going on. But it is only me, myself, and the people I deal with know about it. I have to make a choice, a decision that requires sacrifice as it's either you lose one or another. It is only being kept within myself, and I have no way that I can ever tell Zaza about it. I don't really feel alright keeping all these secrets in my heart though, at some point I do feel like I wanna tell her everything but I just can't as I don't have a choice.

This is the biggest sacrifice I have ever made so far in my life, and biggest decision I've made. There's no turning back for me because what done is done. I feel pity for Zaza as she has to break up and dump me, eventhough to her the reason for breaking up with me is because I'm a flirt. But the real truth lies beneath the skin, it's a decision and sacrifice that I have to make thus I'm required to play a drama so it all seemed like I'm the flirty guy who's been disloyal to her so she can dump me.

I've got no choice, and I'm really sorry. I've made a deal for the sake of the future of my life, and my dreams. I've gotta do what I have to do, and I have no choice. Eventhough I loved Zaza alot and it was so much pain for me to see her suffer, I find the sins in me. It's a sacrifice that I have to make, or else I would lose both. I really feel bad that I didn't get to tell her what is the real truth, because all that she can think of is I flirt behind her back and not being sincere, but that's just a set up that she would never know.

I've got what I have always wanted, and I have to lose Zaza as a price. It's either for one or another, nothing is for free in this world as it all comes with a price. I feel sorry for Zaza at the same time, but I got no choice because it's for the sake of my future and dreams.

Forgive me, and I hope God will have his blessings on everybody.